Hard to Swallow

I am posting a response to my friend Deb’s comment on My May Snow by email because I believe it says something important. Maybe you already have this point that is made here, maybe you don’t. What you do with it is up to your own heart.

Hi Deb,
Were you having surgery this month, May?
You are right Deb there is much clutter. Ever since I quit driving truck and have been home I have accumulated much. In the pictures I think the first thing you probably saw was something covered with a gray tarp, that is the motorcycle I haven’t ridden in around 2 years but hope to get it up and running again soon. I moved it from under the lean-to I built alongside of shed by propane tank. I needed that shelter for the rabbits. Beyond that in front of the shed is lots of scrap metal that needs to go to recycle but isn’t top priority on my invisable list that grows, but from time to time I go pick something out and use it. There is also a stack of blocks just right of the steps down to the drive that I got for free that will come in handy and be used at some point. To the right of it is a stack of old fenceing that was given to me, I use pieces of it from time to time. I used 2 of the posts even though they were somewhat twisted but had concrete at there bases for 2 of the posts for the bee shelter. Even the house has become quite cluttered but between working a full job, coming home and tending the animals and garden the rest isn’t important and isn’t top priority. When the clutter, the dust, or whatever else becomes to much I make time to clean up. But it doesn’t bother me most of the time. My list of chores grows and I know that eventually everything will work out for the best. I just quit worrying about it. For me God comes first in my life. I am like clay being formed, and that is okay with me. I don’t need to rush and force change. The change that sweep through me in 2006 was a change from my old self that was enough to last for an eternity. I change everyday seeing and knowing different things. Mostly seeing God is everything that is good. In the Bible there is a section where it states God is both good and evil. That is hard to swallow but yet I have seen both sides in people. I choose the Good in God. The evils of the world are many and comes from inside each and everyone. Until each and everyone accept the Good in God, God being LOVE, there will not be complete rest in the world. I can not change people nor do I try and force change. I accept hope, love, and faith, knowing LOVE is the greater of all three. My steps in this are quite wobbly, but I don’t worry, worry is not a part of me. I do the best I can giving God the credit for all I do. The shelter I built above the bees may not be perfect but God is. I had no blueprint to follow. I did not rush its completion. I am given direction by vision, but only when not rushed. Having to go and work at a place where I do agree with the waste is hard but I do the best I can by finding something I love within. I love helping the customers. I do not love the thieves who steal and leave empty packages and prices rise for the honest to pay the cost. I do not love the things that are cheaply made and then returned and trashed. I do not love the waste that is buried when those metals and other things could very well be recycled or used by someone else. But it is money that drives peoples hearts. The cleaning of ones heart is hard. It is hard not to wobble. I do NOT love money but love people.
I love you Deb and hope you heal from the surgey of your ankle.
Take care Deb,
Love Billie


About billiescauldron

I am in transition. I see myself as a Spiritual Writer and as such my blog will slowly change with me still holding tight to being in the garden as a child loving my teacher.
This entry was posted in Bible, Christ, Faith, God, Healing, Hope, Love and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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